Kill me first

Kill me first…I heard it again and again. I couldn’t make out where it was coming from, But I knew what it wanted. Kill me first... Over and over in my head I cued hear it. I couldn’t take it anymore and shot out of bed. My eyes open wide from the night mare I had. I cued still feel the cold sweat sliding down my face and back. Taking a deep breath I looked around my room to see everything was in place. I crawled out of bed and in to the shower to clear my head even further. The voice still ringing in my ears, Kill me first… First what do you mean first? Would you want me to kill others too? The water that ran down my body was like haven. It washed all of my pain and worry’s away.

I got out of the shower and reached for my school idea after getting dressed, but then I remembered it was the first day of summer. I didn’t have to do anything. I smiled as I grabbed my phone instead and went to the kitchen. Browsing through the fridge and finding nothing I closed the door. As I did so behind me I heard a loud noise and spun around. There on the ground were three glass cups. I sighed giving my remarks to gravity. Cleaning the glasses was easy, or so I thought. I accidently stepped on what I thought was one peace of glass, but it ended up being three. They were small and hard to get out of my foot but I did so. It was as if all three glasses wanted revenge on me for switching dish soap.

I went to the living room and sat down as I looked at my phone to see if there were any massages from my mom or dad. They were away on there anniversary weekend together. My mom made shire I had everything I needed to survive three years in to the apocalypse last night as she was being pushed out the door. I shook my head as I heard another noise coming from the hall. A gasp of air left my lips as I looked down the hall and saw the three bedroom doors slung up. I was scared to go down the hall but curiosity got the best of me. As I approached the guest bedroom I noticed the sheets on the bed were all over the ground. Freaked out I grabbed the door knob and closed the door. I than went to my room were three of my posters were ripped to shreds and spread all over the ground. Again I closed the door. I was scared to see what would be in my parent’s room as I walked down the hall. My heart was in my thrght as I approached the door. I looked in to see the sheets torn and all over the room. My mom’s mirror was broken and my dad’s dresser had all of the drores opened. Then on the ceiling and walls were scratches, all with three fingers. I slammed the door and ran to the living room.

I was relaxed on the couch. When I felt the need to sleep. I didn’t want to at a time like this, but I cudnt help it. I feel asleep. Soon my chest began to hurt as the voice came back…Kill me first…Do it now! The pain on my chest became over welming and I forced myself to wake up. With a sigh of relief I placed my hand on my chest, but something didn’t feel right. It was warm and sticky. I looked at my hand to see if something was on it, and something was. Blood covered my hand and chest. I yelled wondering what happened as I ran to my room. In my bathroom I cued see how big the wound really was. It stretched all the way from my right shoulder to under my left breast.

 The pain was almost overwhelming as it began to sting from me trying to clean it. At this point it stopped bleeding and was cleaning it really well. I leaned closer to the mirror to look at the wound better. There I was three claw marks. Right in a row. I almost stopped breathing as from the hall I cued hear a voice. At first I couldn’t tell what it was saying but it got closer and closer to my room. I cued tell it was right behind the door and I cued hear it now. Kill me first… Kill me first…please Kill me first. I was scared out of my mind at this point and didn’t know what to do. I wanted to call the police but my phone was in the living room. I hoped that if it wanted me to kill it that it wouldn’t kill me. I made my way to my door and opened it with the little will I had left. Ready to face whatever was haunting me, but there was nothing there. I walked down the hall not wanting to look back. If I cued gust make it to my cell phone maybe I cued be safe. Even for a little bit. KILL ME FIRST!!! I heard the rawer of its voice right behind me as I turned around and saw a demean like man standing in the hall. I didn’t have much time to look at him or it was it charged me in the hall. I did what I cued and side stepped out of the way. I didn’t know what that thing was but I did what first came to my mind. I grabbed the cross that was hanging on the wall and when it charged me again I stabbed it right in the chest.

It feel to the flood almost howling in pain. I looked closer at it when it stopped moving and looked to be dead. I looked at the hands and there were only three fingers. The ring and pinkeye look as if they were cut off. I looked at the thing laying on the ground and realized it really was dead. I killed it, and I liked it.

My last Halloween

 

 

On Halloween night, while trick-or-treating we passed the cemetery. Suddenly we all felt a cold and spooky wind...

Many of my friends shivered from the wind but I didn’t I always liked the cold. Even though I cued still fell something wasn’t right. We ignored it though and went on to enter the cemetery. We told our parents we would be trick or treating with some kids down the street, but instead we all piled in my car for some good Halloween fun. This night would go down in history as the night we died. We just didn’t know it yet…

We walked around for an hour trying to find the oldest head stone. All five of use sat down in front of it not knowing what ells to do. That’s when Melinda pulled a bottle of wine out of her bag. Taking a big gulp she passed the bottle to me. I didn’t hesitate to take a swig. I didn’t care if I was the driver, I’ve driven drunk before. The “party” was getting really excited when Isabel had to use the bathroom. She ran in to the woods, as we kept drink Melinda’s stash of wine.

The cold wind kept blowing at this point not showing any sign of stopping. I heard my name being called somewhere off in the distance. I couldn’t tell were from until someone hit my shoulder with the bottle of wine. My friends asked me what was wrong but I said nothing and went to drink from the bottle, but before it even touched my lips something flew out and hit it knocking it out of my hands and shattering the bottle when it hit the ground. I yelled at my friend thinking she did it, but her face was pail. I looked from one to another trying to ask all of them why they weren’t talking to me. I got no reply.

 I stopped leaning on the old tome stone to touch Melinda’s face. That’s when I heard a scram come from the woods were Isabel Had ran in to the woods. My head spun to look at where the scram had come from I looked back to see if my friends would respond or not but they were just sitting there drinking from the bottle still like nothing had happened. I yelled at them all saying we had to go help her she just screamed!

Out from the woods walked Isabel without any scratches on her. By this time my friends all decided it was time to take the bottle from me thinking I had too much to drink. Once Isabel reached the circle with her friends, I asked if she was alright. With a giggle in her voice she said that using leafs wasn’t as fun as people make it out to be. This time I grabbed the bottle from them saying I was fine. I leaned my head back and took a big swig. When I lifted my head back up my friends were gone. I panicked not hearing any footsteps or when saying they were going somewhere. Then on the ground spelled out in sticks rocks and leaves was “You heard right.” My heart jumped out of me and ran away. I quickly got to my feet and started to run. Only to pass out and hit the ground when something hit my head.

I opened my eyes a little afraid to see what I would see. It was still light out and my friends were all back by the tome stone. I cued hear them calling my name, I wanted to call back but my body wouldn’t listen to me. It was as if I was dead. Finely it hit me; I was standing up when I opened my eyes! My head turned slowly to were my cold corps still laid on the ground. I screamed with all of my might wanting this to be over. Looking again at myself I cued now see what had hit me. It was a knife that had stabbed my spinal cord perfectly. I got closer to it hoping it was just a prank someone was doing on me. I leaned closer to the knife and there it said “1913 the dead can kill”. I jumped back reading that last line.

Soon my friends found were my body laid. As they got closer I looked again at my body to see that this time the knife was gone, and next to my body was a woman. She was holding the knife and wearing a really old dress. It was a dark red color and her hair was messy like she had been out here for days. She walked over to my friends, and one by one she stabbed them in the back of the head. They couldn’t see what was going on, all they know was that something was killing them off. I ran over to her trying to stop her but she kept throwing me to the ground and said “I have been here for 20 years, waiting for this day. Now it’s your job. In 20 years you too must kill a group of people. I’ll give you the hint the spirit before me said, when your dress turns red, know where your knife is.” With that, before I cued even ask what was going on, she dropped the knife by my feet and disappeared. I looked from my body to my friends, back and forth hoping something would happen. Nothing did. I let my anger spill out and let out a powerful scram.

listen and write

 

What I saw when listening to perfect circle

There’s a man driving down an iced road. He’s all alone in his old beat up truck. He’s not happy at all. He finely gets home. It’s a dirt drive way with a large white and blue farm house, with a large front porch. He walks the stars to see his wife. Yet she doesn’t get up to greet him or even turn her head. He repeats this for months. Till one day he comes home early to find her with another man. The man so was cheating with leaves after calming he had no idea. The man walks up the stars and starts to pack a bag as the wife follows saying she was sorry and didn’t mean it. After packing a bag he goes back down stars and starts to walk out the door. The girl reached for his arm but he moved out of the way so she wouldn’t touch him. He goes to his truck and drives off without any snow or frowns.

My song from there’s

Lyrics are from the songs-
Royals by Lorde
Safe and Sound by Capital Cities
Wrecking Ball by Miley Cyrus

 

 

 

We Kissed, I fell under your spell

I never hit so hard in love

I Can't live a lie, running for my life

I will always want you

Even if we're six feet underground

I could lift you up

I could show you my love

We jumped, never asking why

I cute my teeth on wedding rings

Dont you ever say i just walked away

and now, we're ashes on the ground

Music and Writing

2-Royal by lored has to be my favorite song right now. Just the line “I’m in love with being queen” is exactly how I feel. I love being in control and having attention on me all of the time.

3- My taste for music has changed a lot lately. I use to like low beet music that was sadder and now I’m likening more of a fast beat.

4- I’m not really picky on the music, it’s only the ones that make my ears hurt or want to bleed (jb)

5- It’s really funny because my friends are the ones that show me the types of music making me also like it because we have similar taste.

9- When I went to Kansas City with my mom. Oh my gosh we had such a great time drinking star bucks and rocking out to some good old country!

Music to me

What music or songs remind me of my childhood?

-Miss Jansen ‘Queen, and electric light orchestra”

-Me “Anything Disney”

 

Who if your favorite singer or group or song and why?

-Miss Jansen “Croc Smith, so I can get my groove on”

-Me “Skillet, It reminds me of my brother!”

 

What music reminds you of someone you love?

-Miss Jansen “Journey”

-Me “Any christen Pop”

 

Do you go to concerts? Witch concerts are memorable to you? Why?

-Miss Jansen “Yes Elvis when I was 7 and knees heart”

-Me “No but I’m planning on going to one this summer”

 

Which music or artist do you really dislike or refuse to listen to?

-Miss Dune “Miley Cyrus and kasha”

-Me “Miley Cyrus and Justin Bieber”

6 words

 

 

Just moved out of the hospital.

 

 

 

 

Open your eyes to see sunlight.

 

 

 

 

I’ll always remember my loved ones.

 

 

 

My storybook to tell not read.

 

 

 

 

My wings will spread one day.

Window poem

 

There are old stairs that look dried from the hard sun. The splintery boards ready to snap under any presser.

Green grass that looks freshly mowed covered in dew from the night

A bench running along the house also made of dry dray splintery wood.

But now the morning light dues not shine like always, it hides as I still get up.

Sometimes a bunny will hop around on the ground not even knowing I’m there.

The fag to glazes the dew over my yard, still lingers around.

A bird bath that hides in the shadows of my neighbor’s yard.

The pool belonging to the house next to there’s hiding from me, but I know it’s there.

Bosch Hieronymus

 Bosch Hieronymus Was my painters name. He grew up with his father Anthonius Van Aken and uncles, (all of witch were painters). No one knows about his mom or if he even had any siblings. He was born in 1450's and passed away on August 9, 1516. His home town was Hertogenbosch Netherlands. It's said that has he grew up living with painters made him a painter, so they thought him the ways of art. The only challenges Bosch had to go through were trying to get better at painting, Having to deal with not a lot of people liking his works, and trying to show the sins of human life through his art. He was one of the first painters to use abstract art and mostly used acrylic paint, happened during his life would be things like, the French defeating the English in 1450, Jack revolting against the king in 1450, pope Nicolas V making meurs a bishop in 1450, the French king Louis having a war in 1465 and in 1460 there was the curt gourd episcal. A few of his famous painting are named, Hell, Grotesque, and Garden of earthly delights.

Pillow Talk

Every day when I get home I go to my room to change. I know I will have to take a shower for later to start getting ready for the next day but I don’t care. But yesterday was different, I didn’t get folly changed. Only my shirt, I stayed in my jeans for some reason that I still don’t know. I went out to the living room where I sat in my fluffy chair that rocks and put my feet up waiting for my dad to get home. I played on my phone with my bird on my shoulder. Not wanting to move even for a drink I sat there. Soon my dad did come home and I greeted him with the usually “hello papa” Most days we would talk about his and my day and about things that are coming up, but not yesterday. Yesterday I was so tired for reasons that I don’t know. So I fell asleep, right in my chair. At sometime my bird had gone with my dad to his room. My dad later asked for the remote that was next to me and I gave it to him as I rolled over. I remember a few times walking up making my dad look at me and smile. At around 8:30 I took my bird to our room and crawled under the covers myself. But when I couldn’t sleep I got back out of bed to do some homework. I thought for most of the time I was up though. I thought about not talking to my dad. I missed it and was sad that I fell asleep during the time were we’re suppose to talk about the things that went on in my day. But mostly I wanted to ask him about this weekend. I want to practice my makeup for Halloween but cant if I don’t have it.

I kept thinking about my dad and how he probably felt. But that’s when I remembered his smile. It was so kind as if it was saying, “Look at my baby girl.” Even the sounds he was making told me he was happy. There were no loud ruff sighs or cries of pain. Only his loud breathing that he always did. But I couldn’t stop thinking about him last night. My thoughts soon travelled to how my dad feels day to day. Knowing I wasn’t going to get any homework done I gave up and went back to bed. On my bed is one of the pillows that my mom used. I convinced my dad to let me keep it saying how much I loved pillows, but really I found comfort in it. That night I found myself clutching on to it and smelling it trying to smell my mom. Sadly the smells of detergent blocked out her smell. It hurt knowing that part of her was gone too.

I woke up to the sound of my dad’s voice, blinking my eyes wondering what time it was. As the clouds cleared from my brain I answered him say “Hi papa” knowing it was about 6am the time he leaves every morning. I loved it when daddy wakes me up in the morning. This morning though I wanted to jump from my bed and hug him. The only thing keeping me from doing so was the fact of the pillows and blankets had taken me in as one of their own and if I left that would mean I betrayed them.

Memorable Passage

"Nix took his face in both of her hands. "do you love me, Benny?"
Those five words sucked all the air out of planet Earth and left Benny gasping like a trout. His eyes wanted to look left and right to see if there was a way out of this. Maybe he could jump off the roof."
-Dust and Decay by Jonathan Maberry

This passage really reflects on me. A lot of the guys I have dated have said how they love me and for a while I can pool it off as “awww your so sweet” or “I care about you”. The thing is guys wont take that for long. Than I have o say I love them and to be honest I don’t like saying it. I don’t like it because once I say it, it becomes real and more than likely my heart will get broken.

My Future

1)Two things that interested me would be the culinary area and the many art classes. I wouldn’t mind taking a few paint classes. I love to paint a lot. But I plan on being a backer so I won’t always have a flat canvas anymore.

 2) What are the other types of scholarships that I cued try and get if I wanted to go there.

3) In 5 years I would like to be getting out of collage maybe, than at 10 I want to have a steady job as a chef, I would also like to be marred and start thinking about a family. Than with 50 I want to be on my porch with my husband sipping iced tea and eating cookies.

Dont quote me on that...

The Third-Floor Bedroom

Anna and Tom grew up together. They went to the same school and were always the best of friends, in high school though everything changed. Anna would always go to the dances with some jock but this time Tom wanted to let her know how he really felt about her. Asking her to the dance before anyone ells cued would be tuff all he needed to know is what the next dance was. A few weeks passed and he finally found out, it was LPA. Disappointment filled him but he wasn’t going to give up, there’s always the next one. That night as Tom was about to go to bed wanting to get the day over he got a text from Anna saying “I need to talk to you, can you come down stairs???” No matter how late it was Tom always wanted to see Anna, so he typed yeah on my way and left his room. As he walked through the hallway, down the stairs, through the living room and to the front door he couldn’t stop thinking of what Anna wanted. He opened the door and there she was standing with a bouquet of flowers in her hands. Tom was puzzled by the hue think and cued tell she was really nerves with how her face was red and arms were shaking. That’s when Anna started to speak “Tom I know we are the best of friends but that’s not enough for me. SO will you please be my date to LPA” Tom was overjoyed with the hull think and said yes. Anna and Tom stayed together for a year before Anna had to move away to Florida. They would stay up all night texting trying to keep in contact. Tom kept asking Anna to get on a social network but she never wanted to saying it was to main stream, but one night as Tom and Anna were texting, Tom sent her a massage saying that he had moved away too. Before Anna cued ask where her father came running up the stairs and said she needed to pack a bag as fast as she cued and that there was a hurricane heading right for them. Anna knew that a day like this would come and started to through all that she loved in to a bag, photos of Tom and her with their friends, clothes, anything she cued reach. She ran down the stairs clinging to the bag and in to the car with her mother and father. Anna, sighed relief and went to grab her cell phone in her pocket. To find it wasn’t there, “Mom! My cell phone!” Anna cried out as they drove up a hill. “It’s too late Anna, we can’t go back. We’ll just have to get you a new one” Anna started to cry knowing that meant she would never get to see Tom again. That phone had his new address and his number that she cued never get back. A few months later Anna and her family moved in with her grandparents that lived in Tennessee. At first they were staying in a hotel but than her dad got fired from his job because the store was gone and the company didn’t want to rebuild the building. So her moms’ parents said they should move in to their house for a little they cued use the third-floor that had 3 bedrooms and two baths. Anna would go to high school were guys would talk to her all the time, but she never gave up on Tom. One day after school Anna’s mom cued hear Anna crying. It broke her heart because she knew why. She wanted to see Tom again, to hear his voice or read his funny little texts. “Anna, baby? Are you ok?” The crying came to a quick stop as she replied. “Yeah I’m fine mama.” She was so strong and never wanted anyone to see her cry over something like this. Her mom came in to see her with a book over her face. “Anna, you don’t have to hide from me. I’m your mom.” “I’m not hiding from you. I’m in the middle of a really good book, that’s all.” Her mom cued tell, that was a lie. She hated history class and the closest book to her (that is now covering her face) was on how America was born. She couldn’t take it anymore. Seeing her baby girl like this hurt her too much. “Well I have been thinking. That Utah might be nice this time of year, and your spring break is coming up right? So why don’t we go visit our old town so you can get cot up with some friends. You know that ones who might know Tom’s Number?” The book slide down Anna’s face more and more as her mom talked about going back to Utah. Soon she jumped up and hugged her mom till tears again flew out of her eyes. But this time they were tears of joy. Spring break had started and Anna and her Mom were back in Utah for the week. Her dad didn’t want to come because he said it was a girl thing. Knowing that if they couldn’t find Tom’s number, or something that cued lead to him, that Anna would cry longer than ever. Anna knew that this cued always happen but she had faith. She and her mom drove to all of her old friends’ houses looking for pointers on Tom. One said they lost his number, or that he didn’t even have a phone anymore, that he moved to another country or that he moved to the east coast. His social networks were all gone to. Apparently his mom made him delete them because he was too addicted to them, but really he was looking for Anna. Over all they cued not get a lead on him or where he was. Anna was crushed and cried all night by her moms’ side. As soon as Anna got back home, her grandma came up to her. Knowing her grandma was crazy she didn’t really want to talk to her about her failure. That’s when her grandma handed her a key and said. “The room next to yours is always locked, right?” Anna shock her head yes remembering she tried countless times to get in the third bedroom but never cued. “Well this is the key to that room. I think you need to spend a night in that room, but whatever you do! Don’t close the Window!” Anna was shocked at her grandma for being so passionate about a window. But Anna didn’t care she only wanted some sleep. So she took the key up to the room opened the door and dropped her bag. She looked around the room to see dove wallpaper with vines going back in forth behind them. Anna didn’t care much about the room and didn’t like the window being open. She walked over to close it but saw a lock holding it up. So she closed the door, and laid on the bed to fall asleep. But something kept her from sleeping, a noise. It sounded like a bird. She opened her eyes and saw a dove, sitting in front of her. She looked back at the window were she thought it came from and saw a blank spot were a dove once was. Than another one slowly started to peel off the wall the two of them flew together out the window and sang until they saw Anna again. Flying back and forth Anna wanted to follow them to see where they would go and what they would do when they got there. So she ran out the room and down all the stairs. Her mom was shocked to see her and went to stop her but the grandmother closed the door behind Anna. “Mom what are you doing? Where is Anna going” The grandmother smiled and replayed with one line, “were ever the doves take her.” Anna ran after the doves hoping they wouldn’t fly to far from her. But even when they did they would always come back for her, or sing there song louder for her to follow. They lead her to a park were few people were, and flew in to a willow tree. Anna ran to the tree and pushed the branches aside. Then there on the ground looking at his phone was Tom. Anna was shocked to see him and barely whispered his name. “Tom?” He looked up to meet her eyes and was shocked. He thought she was mad at him this haul time and yet heir she was standing in front of him. He too stud up and walked over to her, they hugged and talked about everything that had happened. “But wait, how did you find me?” Anna smiled and knew why her grandma was so passionate about that window, and said. “Well it all began when someone left the window open.”